THE STORYBOARD CALLED LIFE

Love Stories – Chapter 11: Love Lost

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Love Stories-neon2

Cover art by Katrina Nash of Yours Truly. Check out her work on Facebook and Instagram!

This is the eleventh post of the Love Stories series. The pilot is here, Chapter 1 here, 2 here, 3 here,  4 here, 5 is here. 6 here, 7 here, 8 here, 9 here and 10 here.

Sad / happy to tell you that we only have 2 weeks to go!

 


This Is Love

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We received really great Love Stories. So great that Kevin from This is Heaven said that marking them was the hardest thing he ever had to do haha. (To look you in the eye. LOL) 

Thanks again to everyone who entered! I know every time I got one, I was like, this is the one. But unfortunately, there can only be one “one”. But before we share the full story, we wanted to share some extracts of some of the other stories submitted.

 


From the time I was 5, I slowly stored love away, bit by bit, for my future family. I would imagine that my daughter would look enough like me that people would comment and that she would lie on my grumbling belly. My sons would be gentlemen and handsome like my brothers and their sons. My daughters would laugh the way my sister and I laugh when we’re together.


It’s not exactly what you’d call ‘love at first sight’ because that would trivialise the intensity of what it really is. The truth is that in some magical way, in this serendipitous instance, you both already know that in some previous life, you had already once loved each other. You see, the first time you meet these people it isn’t an introduction, it’s more a sigh of relief, that somehow you’d managed to find each other again in this crazy world. Things could finally take off from where they had been left unfinished before.

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I lost my virginity after a month. The next two years were filled with stolen opportunities and secrets. So many secrets. I thought it was exciting and we were being adventurous. But then the insecurities started hitting, and the gaps in our relationship started to show. How could they not?

I had trusted him with all of me, when I didn’t even know all of me. And I didn’t even know what trust really meant. Or what any of it really meant. All I knew was what I felt and I knew it felt good, but it also felt bad, so I stopped focusing on the bad.

 


Is there a certain way to write a love story? Does it need to start sad and finish with a happy ever after? It just needs to be written exactly the way you participated in it, the effort, the struggles, the wins, the losses and the love itself. The truth is, love is fulfilled when you lose your selfish needs and sacrifice this to gain more life for the other. And I want to do this on the daily. Love has certainly come and still has more years to linger and stay, especially when she said yes to Life in Marriage! I won’t have the start of this story any other way.

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My love story didn’t work out the way that I wanted. But I am thankful for it. I have two amazing kids with an amazing woman. I will always love her no matter what happens in life and will always be the one person I can thank for, for making me who I am today.

At a young age, I have achieved things that I never thought I could achieve; I have been a better father, son, brother and friend. I now know how to be a better partner, if I get the opportunity again. Thanks to her, the love of my life.

From this day forward.

 


 

The meaning of Auckland in Maori is Tamaki-makaurau, Land of a thousand lovers. Maori chiefs fought to gain possession of the land. Hundreds of years later I can understand their love for this land as I feel it too, it isn’t time for me to return yet but I would love to get married, live life and get buried in the land that has given me so much.

 


And the winner is … 

 

 

 

 

 


Loved & Lost

–  Ester Luatuanuu

 

Perhaps this isn’t really a love story. It feels more like a letter. The type of letter you wish you could send to your ex-lover when all is said and done.

A pleasant Surprise.

That’s what I told myself you were. It had been so long that I almost forgot how to love. So when love came to me, he was like a face I recognised but could not name. Love tried to ignite a flame and I tried to douse it when it sparked. Now all I have are the embers of our memories to keep me warm. Embers that are the ghost of the fire that was you. And the fire that could have been us.

You came into my life at a time when I didn’t love myself.

It all started with your approach.

The kindness in your words.

The type of kindness that goes right to your soul and you just feel how gentle their soul is.

You made me want to stir words into existence, just by asking about my wildest dreams.

You opened my heart to excitement whenever you messaged me.

You opened my heart up to be vulnerable without me even realising it.

 

But I lied to you, so many times. 

I lied when I said I was too busy to pick up the phone. I didn’t want to seem like I was always wanting to hear from you.

I lied when I said I couldn’t say I love you. I didn’t want to be the first to say it.

I lied when I said I was fine. I didn’t want to seem like a woman you could easily break.

I lied when I said I had nothing to share. I wasn’t comfortable with being vulnerable. 

 

I was always expecting without ever giving.

Many times, I asked you to bare your soul naked.

Yet I was embarrassed to do so.

I built walls to shield myself or distract myself from the undeniable fact that I cared for you.

If I was brutally honest with you…

I would tell you how much I loved your dorkiness.

I’d tell you how much I loved how much you loved your family.

I loved how happy you were when you told me you bought Starbucks on vacation.

I loved how shy you were whenever I complimented you.

I loved how you always remembered every word I said as if you wrote them down so you didn’t forget.

I loved whenever you made time for me even when you were tired.

I loved how you pointed out I was complicated.

I loved that showed me that that wasn’t a horrible thing.

I loved how calm you were whenever you felt my angst.

But most of all, I loved that you forced me to break down my walls.

I loved… you.

Your brief presence caused me to realise, I want to love.

I realised that I don’t mind getting hurt in the process of loving.

Love is worth it in the end.

You taught me that love is kind and honest.

You taught me that it’s okay to be vulnerable.

That love is vulnerable and to be vulnerable isn’t weak at all.

That it doesn’t matter how long I’ve known someone or the distance between us, it could have been love.

It doesn’t even matter if I loved you and you didn’t feel the same.

I still want to love and love deeply. 

We usually come to understand someone more in their absence. I feel as though I understand you more, now that you’re gone. Or perhaps I’ve come to understand myself a little better. Although all that remains of us are the embers, the lessons you’ve taught me has ignited a fire in my heart. A courageous fire, a refining fire. A fire that is teaching me to love unconditionally.

 


I felt his absence anytime he wasn’t there – life felt a little more monotone and a little less vibrant.

 


 

Check out the second-last chapter of Love Stories, live on the Storyboard Called Life on Wednesday 5 July at 3 pm AEST

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Written by Candice

July 5, 2017 at 2:55 pm

Posted in Love Stories

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